I was listening to a song called "Fall" by Ascend the Hill and thinking of those who have felt rejected, hurt, and broken by the Church, my heart so full and heavy it hurt.
"This is my heart," I felt God say to me.
"Lord, forgive me for every thing I've ever done that has broken Your heart and made You cry," I whispered through tears. "Forgive the Church for all the things we do that break Your heart and make You weep over us. Forgive us for our hatred, hypocrisy, fear, and lovelessness. Forgive us for looking so unlike Jesus."
As my heart broke over the failings of the Church, I felt anger rising up in me. Not against any particular person but against the Body of Christ, against our sin, against our portrayal of the Good News in so many ways.
Just then a song called "The Church" by Derek Webb came on my ipod.
"Cuz I haven't come for only you,
but for my people to pursue.
You cannot care for Me
with no regard for Her;
If you love Me you will love the Church."
I have married into this Bride, this Body, this dysfunctional, messy, ridiculous family. I am a part of the Body and cannot disconnect myself without becoming completely useless. If a hand, an ear, a nose tries to detach itself from the body, it can no longer function as it was intended to function, as a piece of a greater whole. There have been beautiful things done through the Church, and there continue to be beautiful, reconciling practices being put in place by the Church. I cannot focus on an aspect I do not like while disregarding all the beauty God has brought about through the Church.
Lord, break my heart for what breaks Yours. Lead me deeper into Your love; let me see with Your eyes.
"Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come. All this is from God, who through Christ reconciled us to himself and gave us the ministry of reconciliation; that is, in Christ God was reconciling the world to himself, not counting their trespasses against them, and entrusting to us the message of reconciliation. Therefore, we are ambassadors for Christ, God making his appeal through us. We implore you on behalf of Christ, be reconciled to God." 1 Cor 17-20
"This is my heart," I felt God say to me.
"Lord, forgive me for every thing I've ever done that has broken Your heart and made You cry," I whispered through tears. "Forgive the Church for all the things we do that break Your heart and make You weep over us. Forgive us for our hatred, hypocrisy, fear, and lovelessness. Forgive us for looking so unlike Jesus."
As my heart broke over the failings of the Church, I felt anger rising up in me. Not against any particular person but against the Body of Christ, against our sin, against our portrayal of the Good News in so many ways.
Just then a song called "The Church" by Derek Webb came on my ipod.
"Cuz I haven't come for only you,
but for my people to pursue.
You cannot care for Me
with no regard for Her;
If you love Me you will love the Church."
I have married into this Bride, this Body, this dysfunctional, messy, ridiculous family. I am a part of the Body and cannot disconnect myself without becoming completely useless. If a hand, an ear, a nose tries to detach itself from the body, it can no longer function as it was intended to function, as a piece of a greater whole. There have been beautiful things done through the Church, and there continue to be beautiful, reconciling practices being put in place by the Church. I cannot focus on an aspect I do not like while disregarding all the beauty God has brought about through the Church.
Lord, break my heart for what breaks Yours. Lead me deeper into Your love; let me see with Your eyes.
"Be still.
Know that I am God.
You are not here to save the world.
I've already done that.
You are here to mend it."
"Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come. All this is from God, who through Christ reconciled us to himself and gave us the ministry of reconciliation; that is, in Christ God was reconciling the world to himself, not counting their trespasses against them, and entrusting to us the message of reconciliation. Therefore, we are ambassadors for Christ, God making his appeal through us. We implore you on behalf of Christ, be reconciled to God." 1 Cor 17-20
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